Unseen vs. Hidden

I don’t know about you, but I love a good podcast. I listened to this podcast a few months ago that changed my perspective completely! Let me tell you about it…

The podcast is called “A Beautiful Story” by C3 NYC. My friend recommended it to me, and I had a feeling it was going to be a good one so I listened to it right away. All I have to say is this is one of the coolest stories I have ever heard. I highly recommend you listen to it.

It’s a true story about this girl named Mia Fieldes. She is living the life of a single woman, and is wondering when or if she will ever meet her husband. It is a love story like no other, the specific events and details that go into it are amazing! I’m not going to spoil the whole story, you will have to go listen for yourself. But, I will share with you what I learned from this story, that completely shifted my perspective on the topic of singleness.

Currently, I am 18 years old and in college. I have never had a boyfriend or really even considered dating anyone seriously. I have never been the type to be “obsessed” with boys or always have a crush on someone. I used to always think I was kind of weird and questioned why I was never “boy crazy.”

I’m not sure why I am like this, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve started to see why I am the way I am. Sure, I would like to be in a relationship one day, but that’s not my “ultimate goal” in life. I have to learn how to be content and happy with who I am first, before I can give myself fully to someone else. 

I think one reason I have never been in a relationship, is because God is protecting and guarding my heart. I have prayed and prayed that God would guard my heart and protect it at all costs.

Here I am praying this prayer, then I question and ask God why I’m not in a relationship. When I do this it always makes me chuckle. I can see God laughing and smiling at me saying, “My daughter, you have asked me to guard your heart and protect it at all costs, so that is what I am doing. I am saving you and your feelings for one special man in particular.”

God’s timing is the best timing. He knows what is best for me so I shouldn’t question when something is going to happen or if it will ever happen.

I have also prayed to God that I want my husband to be the only person I date or have a serious relationship with. I have prayed this for years, then when I ask God why I haven’t dated anyone yet He reassures me yet again.

Then comes another funny comment from God, “My sweet daughter, you have asked me to only allow you to be in a relationship with the person you will marry one day, that is why you haven’t dated anyone yet. You want me to save you for that one special person, so that is what I am doing, you just have to trust my timing on this one.”

Now we are going to get into the Unseen vs. Hidden topic of this blog. This analogy was talked about in the podcast that has changed my view on singleness forever, and I hope it does for you too.

She talked about while she was waiting to find her husband how she would feel discouraged when no guy would show any interest in her or she wasn’t dating someone. She talks about the difference between being unseen and being hidden.

It’s not that I am being unseen or rejected by every guy that sees me, it’s that God is HIDING me and protecting me while I wait for the ONE He is specifically preparing for me. So, I will wait. The wait is always worth it because I am on God’s timing, not my own. There is no need for me to date around just so I can feel good about getting “attention” from guys. I will wait for the one that I have been praying for.

On another hand, I know that marriage isn’t promised to everyone. Some people are called to a life of singleness. Neither one is “bad.” God gives the gift of singleness to some, and the gift of marriage to others. Each is a gift from God. His plan for our lives is always better and greater than what we think is best for us. 

“There is a difference between being unseen and being hidden. God has been protecting me for the one that He has in store for me.”

If you are a young, single girl, I encourage you to start praying for your future husband now. While God does not promise all of us to have a husband, He does promise to give us the desires of our hearts.

I started praying for my future husband around the age of 14 or 15! Some people may think that could be too young to start, but I think it is so important to develop the discipline of praying for your future.

You can do this by starting a prayer journal, or by just simply praying for your future husband when you think about him. I have a prayer journal that I started when I was 14 and it’s funny to look back on. I don’t write in it a ton, but I do talk to God about my future husband. I pray for his character and what specific qualities I want in a guy one day.

I pray that he is a protector, provider, hard-worker, loving, fun, people person, God-fearing, thoughtful, understanding, and so much more.

My challenge to you today is to start praying for your future spouse. I also challenge you to prepare yourself for your future spouse. Yes, it's important to pray for your future husband, but it would be silly to do that, and then not be preparing yourself for marriage.

Singleness is our time to dive deep with God and go all in. We have no distractions, demands, or anything holding us back from going wherever God calls us to go. Don't waste your season of singleness. Don't wish you were in another season of life. Be present, be where your feet are planted.

As the amazing Justin Bieber once said in a song "The grass isn't always greener on the other side, it's green where you water it!" How true is that statement. We have to work on our personal relationship with God and our personal development before marriage. We have to water where we want to grow!

Chase after the Lord as fast and hard as you can, and then when someone starts running alongside you and is going in the same direction as you, then you'll know that there might be something special about that guy. :)

Whether we are given the gift of singleness or the gift of marriage, we are called to glorify God no matter the circumstances. His plans are always higher and greater than our own. Keep pressing on, and don't waste whatever season you are in. The Lord is trying to teach you something.

- Kayla Milligan